Honestly, guys, I only go to about one fucking show a year. And why is that? Why would an avid music listener like myself voluntarily avoid going to see the musicians he loves live and in person? The honest truth, other than the fact that the tours I want to see rarely ever come to my city, is that I don't really enjoy going to shows to begin with.
Summer Slaughter for example. You have over five fucking bands in a row playing all afternoon into the night at volumes so nauseatingly loud that you can barely hear any fucking nuances of the songs you love so much, leaving you unsatisfied as you roast inside a cramped room where the oxygen has been replaced with steam emanating from a thousand sweaty bodies all pushed up against you, AND YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE THE STAGE. When you think about it, a live metal show is a flawed proposition. Metal bands are almost always better in the studio to say the least, and most metal bands I've seen live just don't deliver. Another aspect about the live metal show that bores me is that these bands rarely ever "stretch out" in a live setting. There's simply no room in a Black Dahlia Murder song, for example, for any improvisation or any way to create an "extended version" of whatever song. Led Zeppelin, for example, now that's a band to see live. They rarely ever play a song live the way it was put onto tape, making the live Zep experience a must-see. Shit, If I want to hear every song exactly how it's played on the album, I'll just stay the fuck home and listen to the goddamned album rather than pay 30 bucks to hear an inferior version of it live while getting chewed up in the pit. Oh, and you run in to a lot of shithead assholes at these events, just throwing that out there. The last concert I went to was Wolves in the Throne Room last year and it was a prime example of what I'm talking about: asshole audience members with no view of the band. And hell, it was still what I would consider a good show, which is kinda sad.
ANYWAY, I will see this year's Metal Alliance tour which hits my city tomorrow for one reason: the mighty and ridiculously heavy High on Fire will be playing it. Whenever Matt Pike and HoF stop by here, it's always at a 21 and up venue that I can't get into until I'm, y'know, 21. So this is a rare opportunity to see the band in an all ages setting, so I shall attend. But what about all I've said about live metal shows so far? Look, I don't expect High on Fire to be that great of a live band, not at all. And me being short will probably prevent me from seeing the stage unless I get there really early so I can stand at the front of the line for hours and get a front row spot where I will be crushed by all the bodies pushing up against me trying to get closer to the stage, as if that does anything. Another thing I gotta note is that out of the 5 bands playing the show, High on Fire is the only one I want to see. Holy grail and Municipal waste are cool I guess, but I've never given that much of a shit abut Exodus although I do have respect for them, and I flat-out dislike Anthrax altogether. The first show I ever saw was Judas Priest with Anthrax opening for them in '05, and sitting through Anthrax was miserable. Joey Bellodonna is the single biggest tool I have ever seen on stage. No, he's the whole fucking tool shed complete with those little pink lawn flamingos to top it off. In fact, I'm planning on getting the hell out of the club before Anthrax starts. But the thing that's compelling me to see this show tomorrow is just that I simply love High on Fire and their signature brand of rhinoceros heavy molten sludge, so why not just go and get pummeled by it? As long as I keep a good attitude about it I'm sure me and my friends will have more fun than a serial killer in a crowded mall. Metal Forever \m/!
Summer Slaughter for example. You have over five fucking bands in a row playing all afternoon into the night at volumes so nauseatingly loud that you can barely hear any fucking nuances of the songs you love so much, leaving you unsatisfied as you roast inside a cramped room where the oxygen has been replaced with steam emanating from a thousand sweaty bodies all pushed up against you, AND YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE THE STAGE. When you think about it, a live metal show is a flawed proposition. Metal bands are almost always better in the studio to say the least, and most metal bands I've seen live just don't deliver. Another aspect about the live metal show that bores me is that these bands rarely ever "stretch out" in a live setting. There's simply no room in a Black Dahlia Murder song, for example, for any improvisation or any way to create an "extended version" of whatever song. Led Zeppelin, for example, now that's a band to see live. They rarely ever play a song live the way it was put onto tape, making the live Zep experience a must-see. Shit, If I want to hear every song exactly how it's played on the album, I'll just stay the fuck home and listen to the goddamned album rather than pay 30 bucks to hear an inferior version of it live while getting chewed up in the pit. Oh, and you run in to a lot of shithead assholes at these events, just throwing that out there. The last concert I went to was Wolves in the Throne Room last year and it was a prime example of what I'm talking about: asshole audience members with no view of the band. And hell, it was still what I would consider a good show, which is kinda sad.
ANYWAY, I will see this year's Metal Alliance tour which hits my city tomorrow for one reason: the mighty and ridiculously heavy High on Fire will be playing it. Whenever Matt Pike and HoF stop by here, it's always at a 21 and up venue that I can't get into until I'm, y'know, 21. So this is a rare opportunity to see the band in an all ages setting, so I shall attend. But what about all I've said about live metal shows so far? Look, I don't expect High on Fire to be that great of a live band, not at all. And me being short will probably prevent me from seeing the stage unless I get there really early so I can stand at the front of the line for hours and get a front row spot where I will be crushed by all the bodies pushing up against me trying to get closer to the stage, as if that does anything. Another thing I gotta note is that out of the 5 bands playing the show, High on Fire is the only one I want to see. Holy grail and Municipal waste are cool I guess, but I've never given that much of a shit abut Exodus although I do have respect for them, and I flat-out dislike Anthrax altogether. The first show I ever saw was Judas Priest with Anthrax opening for them in '05, and sitting through Anthrax was miserable. Joey Bellodonna is the single biggest tool I have ever seen on stage. No, he's the whole fucking tool shed complete with those little pink lawn flamingos to top it off. In fact, I'm planning on getting the hell out of the club before Anthrax starts. But the thing that's compelling me to see this show tomorrow is just that I simply love High on Fire and their signature brand of rhinoceros heavy molten sludge, so why not just go and get pummeled by it? As long as I keep a good attitude about it I'm sure me and my friends will have more fun than a serial killer in a crowded mall. Metal Forever \m/!
Now here's what I'm talking about when I say that High on Fire is as badass as it gets
No comments:
Post a Comment